May’s Gossip Column, August 3, 2017

Segment #1

A couple was driving on Highway 401. Suddenly, a flashing Porsche sports car cut them off without any signals, and did the same to other passenger cars on another lane. The eye-catching Porsche zigzagged, and soon disappeared beyond the sights. The wife complained to the husband:”I really hate people suddenly change lanes without signals, see, see, there is another one!” The husband calmly said:”Dear, don’t be frustrated. If I were driving a Porsche Sports, I would do the same. ”

Segment #2

A couple and their daughter went to a thrift shop.
The mother admired a pretty jar:”Oh, dear, this crystal jar is so pretty, and the price is reasonable.”
The father tapped the jar by a finger nail, and firmly claimed:”It is not crystal, only a glass jar.”
The mother said:”But, they labeled it crystalware. Since I really like it, I will take it home.”
At home, the daughter googled for crystalware, and talked to her parents:”According to the internet, crystalware is well-made glass, it contains…”
“Crystal is not glass!” her father cut her off.
“But, Dad, crystalware contains heavy weight LEAD according to the Heath Canada’s website! ”